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A Bro’s Breakdown Of Colton’s ‘Bachelor’ Contestants Betches

I’m Jared Freid. I’m a 33 year old comedian who loves The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. I love it so much, I live tweet every episode @jtrain56. As you can imagine, my father is v proud. V.

For years, I’ve broken down the contestants before the new season. When I first started doing these, Snapchat was just an app to see boobs, and Instagram wasn’t a career. Also, ABC would only give me a picture, a name, an age, where they were from, and a profession. I’d make massive assumptions based on that small amount of information and that was my preview. Then ABC was like, “Let’s interview these monsters,” and suddenly my job got easier. Maybe too easy. The contestants would give weird answers, and you could basically tell which of them were Instagram follower thirsty...

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5 Weird Realities Of Composing Music For Movies And Ads

If you don’t think professional composers are important, observe the grand ending of Star Wars with John Williams’ score removed:

Creating background music specifically designed to manipulate your emotions is a job that’s both harder and weirder than you’d probably think. We talked to composers John Keltonic, Jonathan David Russell, and Thomas O’Boyle, who told us how …

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A Two-Note Chime Can Take A Ridiculous Amount Of Effort

You’ll probably hear a hundred electronic tones today from various gadgets — your phone, your car, your microwave — and never thought about the poor bastards behind the scenes who obsessed over getting those tones just right...

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23 Helpful Shortcuts For Keeping Yourself Fed

If you’ve ever burned down an apartment heating up a cup of Kraft Easy Mac because you left a spoon in it, you aren’t alone. But cooking doesn’t have to be so deadly — and we’ve got some tips that’ll help keep your home and eyebrows intact.

Pretty much you’ll be the next Gordon Ramsay after reading this — complete with excessive swearing.

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Entry by Writables

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by Writables

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Entry by Jesmonster

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by Jesmonster

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6 Weirdly Specific Tropes Movies Got Briefly Obsessed With

Hollywood is a constant savage battle between artistic vision and producers desperate not to be fired. Sometimes this means crowd-pleasing fun, but most times it means each new idea gets grabbed by every studio and wrung dry over the course of a few years before they move on to the next one.

Some of those ideas are weirdly specific. Like freakishly, pointlessly specific. For instance …

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Five Out Of Six Movie Deaths Are Now Caused By Huge Blue Light Beams

There are an infinite number of ways for aliens to kill us. They can drop asteroids on us, grow replacements of us in pods, or carefully wait for every Earth government to elect an insecure idiot with nuclear capabilities. But somewhere along the way, all movie aliens agreed on a single method: a big stupid beam of blue light.

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